Jokes (EN)

[hub]

2

[DreaM]

2

 

Its ok spam how much you can, you dont earn a single post so... take your time ruind the thread but wont help you instead.

[kriamst]

Its ok spam how much you can, you dont earn a single post so... take your time ruind the thread but wont help you instead.

 

I think no1 cares :)

[Satanus]

This little 6 year old girl comes running home all distressed and howling her head off. Her mother, finally gets it out of her between the bawling, that her daughter has been raped. The mother settles the little girl down, enough to get her to the police station, to report this horrible act.

At the police station, the sergent interviewing the little girl, asks as nicely as he can: "Could you please tell me what the nasty man did, so we can get him?"

The little girl sobs "Yeah, I'll try sniff, sniff"

Policeman: "Righto then what's happened?"

Girl: "sob Well I was walking down the street to get mummy some milk. sniff sob When the big nasty man jumped out and grabbed me bawl"

Policeman: "Yes please go on ..."

Girl: "Then sob sob he lifted up my dress howl"

Policeman: "then? ..."

Girl: "He pulled down my pants ... absolutely bawling now ..... no I can't go on ...."

The sergent then stands up from behind the desk wanking himself for dear life and says "WELL FUCKING MAKE SOMETHING UP!"

[scorpius]

This is prolly the lamest thing u ever heart ...But yet try to answer :P

 

Q) What would you call Bill Gate's mother if she was bored ? Please try to think of a technical term.

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Answer: Motherbored

lol :P *runs*

[~!M@R@SL@K0SsS!~]

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OK enough.......:)

[levex]

Well, i m not good in telling jokes, but i enjoyed some ;)

 

TY

[lluehhhb]

xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

[etatoo]

:D

[ZeRo*]

:)

[Medson™]

Tarzan, King of the Elephant Trunk  (That one is really LoL Grin)

 

  Tarzan gets into a huge fight with a lion in the jungles of Africa. The lion is defeated, but not before it rips off Tarzan's arm, eye, and dick. Of course, Tarzan's jungle friends help him out by giving him the parts he needs -- the eye of an eagle, the arm of a gorilla, and an elephant trunk for a dick. A while later, Cheeta the Chimp asks Tarzan how his new parts are working out for him.

"Tarzan like. With new eye, can see far. With new arm, Tarzan strong. But no like new wee-wee."

 

"Why's that?"

 

"It keep taking weeds and shoving in Tarzan's ass."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Moms and Their Snooping 

 

    Three women are discussing their teenage daughters.

The first declares: "I was so shocked last week. I was tidying my daughter''s room and I found a packet of cigarettes under her pillow. I didn't even know that she smoked!"

 

"It gets worse than that," says the second mother. "I was tidying my daughter''s room last week and I found a bottle of vodka under her bed. I didn't even know that she drank!"

 

"Oh, it gets even worse than that," says the third mother. "I was tidying my daughter''s room last week and you''ll never guess what I found in her bedside cabinet: a packet of condoms! I didn't even know that she had a penis!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our Four Sons 

 

  Four guys went golfing; one went in the clubhouse to pay while the others waited at the first tee. One of the guys says, “I'm so proud of my son. He is a stock broker and he's made enought that he just gave away a huge portfolio.” The next guy said, “I'm so proud of my son. He's a car dealer and he's doing so well, he just gave away a Ferrari.” The third guy says, “I'm so proud of my son. He's got enough money that he just gave away a million-dollar home.”

Just as the third guy fininshes talking, the fourth guy joins them and asks, “What are you guys talking about?'

“Just about how good our sons are doing,” the three men replied. “Well, my son is doing very well,” says the fourth man, “He's a male stripper and just last week he got a huge portfolio, a Ferrari and a million-dollar home.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

i copy maestro!

[h!MaNnN]

;D

verry funny

[gkara]

The first time I went to a drug store to buy condoms, I was waited on by a

beautiful young woman. She asked what size I wanted and I said I wasn't

sure. So she asked now big I was and I said, "Compared to what?" She held

up one finger and asked if I was that big. I said, "I'm bigger than that."

Then she held up two fingers and asked if I was that big. I said, "I'm

bigger than that." Then she held up three fingers and asked if I was that

big. I said, "I'm about that big." She put the three fingers in her mouth

and said, "You're a medium."

[xAddytzu]

:slap:

[karma123]

Rich family man and woman think how to make iconomy in the family budget:

-Mary Ann if you learn how to cook we can fired the cooker girl !

-Dear if you learn how to make love we can fired the driver !

 

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Woman is on the dentist chair and she is ready to go for operation when her phone start to ring...she gives signs to the dentist to dont pick it up..but the dentist pick up the phone and says:

- Now her mouth is bussy when i am finish she is going to spill it out and ring to you!