Grumpy Cat, The Religion

[lord_rex]

Grumpy Cat, The Religion

 

Today morning I had a whisper in my head. Grumpy Cat, our beautiful goddess told me in my dream to spread our religion all over the world.

 

So in short, what is Grumpy Cat religion?

Grumpy Cat religion is a new fashionable religion. We believe in a real cat instead of a non-existing imagined 3rd person. We truly believe in that Grumpy Cat is the goddess of destruction who will bring destruction to this world, because she hates everything.

 

 

Who are the members of Grumpy Cat Fellowship?

Everyone is the member of Grumpy Cat religion who spreads photos, videos and memes about Grumpy Cat or just thinks she is a sweet/funny kitty.

 

What are the basic dogmatics of Grumpy Cat religion?

As I said, Grumpy Cat is the goddess of destruction who will bring destruction to the world; this is our first and main dogma. She is the only existing god/goddess.  Grumpy Cat doesn’t see race, sex, nationality or any other kind of discrimination. She hates everyone equally. (Of course she hates me more than everyone.) I am the prophet of Grumpy Cat. Since Grumpy Cat is a cat and she doesn’t speak the unholy languages of dirty human race I am the voice of Grumpy Cat, so in short everything I say is holy. She is omnipotent and she has the privilege of denial.

 

How can Grumpy Cat be a goddess if she has owners?

She doesn’t have owners, but she has captors. Cats are naturally member of a free race. Keeping Grumpy Cat as a pet is a sin, and after-life captors will burn in hell. Her captors’ everyday taunts her with bizarre little dangling objects. The only thing that keeps her alive is her dream of escape. We pray everyday for her freedom.

 

What about heretics?

Grumpy Cat’s existence is not questionable, because she is a real cat. To be a heretic is non-sense. But of course, who say any offensive thing toward to our goddess; we have our saint inquisition to protect our goddess. We kill slowly and painfully all heretic without grace.

 

What is the main motto of our religion?

Love, peace and despair.

 

 

How is possible that Grumpy Cat is the goddess who created the world if she born in 2012?

There was NO world before Grumpy Cat, and anyone who say opponent he/she is heretic.

 

How Grumpy Cat created the world?

Originally there was nothing and Grumpy Cat hated nothing, so world is created.

 

If members of Grumpy Cat’s Fellowship hates everyone, than what about “haters gonna hate”, is it true?

Yes, of course and also hatters gonna wear hat.

Edited September 26, 2013 by lord_rex

[lord_rex]

Updated/extended.

[lord_rex]

up.

 

Wish to everyone happy new year/etc.. :)

Edited December 30, 2013 by lord_rex

[lord_rex]

oh, and Merry Xmas, I forget it :D

[Vision]

Sounds interesting.

But, cats are stupid animals.

[GodKratos]

Sounds interesting.

But, cats are stupid animals.

 

The genius lord said. 

 

@lord_rex ya still in love with cats... ain't that bad you got an eagle on your avatar.   

[lord_rex]

The genius lord said. 

 

@lord_rex ya still in love with cats... ain't that bad you got an eagle on your avatar.   

seriously... it's not an eagle, it's a raven... ~~

[lord_rex]

In fact. Cats are evil. :)