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The best 30 Facts of Chuck Norris


-$karos-

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I choose each one of them Wisely.

 

Chuck Norris can eat a rubix cube and shit it out solved

 

Chuck Norris uses Tabasco Sauce for eye drops.

 

Chuck Norris can bend light with his bare hands.

 

Chuck Norris is so tough just thinkink about him increases your physical ability.

 

Chris angel can walk on water but chuck Norris can swim on land.

 

Chuck Norris can turn the jonas brothers into a non gay-band .

 

Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

 

Chuck Norris is so manly that he lost his virginity before his dad.

 

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

 

Chuck Norris tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried

 

Chuck Norris once shot down a plane with his finger by yelling *bang*

 

Chuck Norris can make a snowman out of rain

 

Chuck Norris can kill 2 stones with one bird

 

Chuck Norris must run at least 2 hours per day otherwise the earth will stop spinning.

 

Chuck Norris doesn't pray at night, he just lays on his bed and he waits for Jesus to pray to him...

 

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle

 

Chuck Norris can get out of a check mate

 

Chuck Norris doesn't read books.He stares at them until he gets the information he wants.

 

Chuck Norris is able to sit while standing.

 

Chuck Norris can eliminate the recycle bin.

 

Chuck Norrris looked into a mirror but no chuck came out their could only be one chuck norris

 

Chuck Norris once created a rock so heavy he couldn't even lift it, but then he did anyways.

 

Chuck Norris Died 10 years ago, but death was too scared to tell him.

 

When Chuck Norris buys something,the seller gives him money.

 

When God said,Let there be light.Chuch Norris said, "Say please."

 

When Chuck Norris pees, it rains.

 

Little kids sumimes pee there names in snow....chuck norris can pee his name in concrete.

 

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

 

Superman goes to bed with Chuck Norris Pajamas.

 

They say that when chuck norris does push ups he dosnt go up he pushes the world down

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They were supposed to be funny? I forgot how to laugh then. Well not really they really ARE funny but they are too damn repeated and old they got pathetic the only epic shit i will always remember is "chuck norris can kill 1 rock with 2 birds" or w/e.

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